An Essex Welfare Bum Who Sicced His Dog on Cats and Beat Them with His Cane Is Now Pretending to Be the Victim of an Assault

John Randall and Scrappy

"They leapt out, pouncing on my dog. They were biting and scratching her. I tried to get them off but then they started scratching me. I had to hit them with my walking stick and they still wouldn't leave her alone. I did nothing to provoke them and my dog was terrified but they kept jumping at us."
-- John Randall

The outrageous lies concocted by cat-haters and disseminated by their buddies within the capitalist media just keep getting bigger and more fantastic with each passing day.

If fifty-two-year-old, arthritic John Randall is to be believed, he and his four-year-old Jack Russell Terrier, Scrappy, were strolling on Chatham Pavement in Pitsea, Essex, at around 11 a.m. on September 18th when they were ambushed by five feral cats who sprang from underneath a parked car.

"They leapt out, pouncing on my dog. They were biting and scratching her. I tried to get them off but then they started scratching me," is how he described the encounter to the Daily Mail on September 22nd. (See "Pack of Feral Cats Terrorize Housing Estate Ambushing Pedestrians and Attacking Dog.") "I had to hit them with my walking stick and they still wouldn't leave her alone."

Of course, to hear Randall tell it both he and Scrappy were totally innocent victims. "I did nothing to provoke them and my dog was terrified but they kept jumping at us," he swore to the Daily Mail.

Randall, who not only claims to be disabled but also lives in public housing, is an old hand at playing the victim and thus conning the social welfare system out of every nickel that he can get. It therefore is not surprising that he has put those finely-honed talents to work at the cats' expense.

"I was really shocked. I've seen cats fight before but this was like a free-for-all," he continued. "In the end I pulled Scrappy close to me and got her away. I was left with scratches down my leg and Scrappy is (sic) really scared."

Anyone who cares to believe that this burly blighter armed with a cane and a Jack Russell Terrier was the innocent and victimized party in this altercation is welcome to indulge themselves in their delusions, but Randall is quite obviously serving up to the public a severely redacted version of events. A far more likely scenario is that as soon as Scrappy got a whiff of the cats' presence underneath the car she started growling and went after them.

After all, Jack Russell Terriers are notoriously pugnacious dogs that are well-known for their tendency to attack other animals. Even their admirers often refer to them as terrorists.

More to the point, it is highly improbable that Randall calls his dog Scrappy because she has a placid personality. Au contraire, he more than likely encourages her aggressiveness and eggs her on to attack cats.

The breed additionally has a rather checkered history when it comes to cats. For example, the scum-of-the-earth racist imperialists in South Africa used them in order to track down at least eight-hundred-ninety-seven cats on Marion Island between 1986-1989. The cats were then shot at night by marksmen carrying torches. That was in addition to the more than twenty-five-hundred cats that the South Africans either poisoned or deliberately infected with panleukemia.

One of the Cats Attacked by Randall and Scrappy

More generally speaking, it is ludicrous for Randall or anyone else to maintain that they were attacked by a cat. Both experience and logic attest to the fact that cats, especially ferals, are scared to death of both people and dogs and only become violent after they have been attacked. 

Even Klare Kennett of the RSPCA is skeptical of Randall's lies. "It is not unusual to get communities of feral cats but it is unusual for them to attack someone," she told the Daily Mail in the article cited supra. "I can only imagine they had a litter nearby and felt threatened by the presence of the dog."

The most unfair part of this scenario is that whereas Randall is free to run his trap until the cows come home, the cats are unable to speak for themselves. If they were able to do so, it is certain that a far different account of events would soon emerge.

As Ernest Hemingway knew only too well, cats have impeccable integrity. "A cat has absolute honesty. Human beings, for one reason or another, may hide their feelings, but a cat does not," he once wrote.

The sensationalist English media likewise have contributed mightily to this injustice by simply accepting Randall's ludicrous assertions as gospel. It would have been easy enough for the press to have spent some time on the estate visiting with the cats and interviewing other tenants. From those interactions, the reporters surely would have been able to ascertain the truth.

It also must be noted that by Randall's own admission the cats have been living on the estate for at least six years and this appears to have been the first reported attack. If they are as prone to violence as he and the capitalist media allege, there surely would have been a multitude of prior assaults.

Sadly, logic, truth, and fairness count for absolutely nothing with either die-hard cat-haters like Randall or the moneybags media. Both are motivated by the same perverse desire: to do in cats at any cost!

A strikingly similar situation is currently unfolding in Minneapolis where eighty-two-year-old Lee Noltimier's nineteen-year-old cat, Hoppy, has several times felt the wrath of Minneapolis Animal Care and Control (MACC) for defending his turf against dogs. Not only has he been grounded for life, but MACC has vowed to kill him if he gets into any more scrapes with dogs. (See Cat Defender post of October 18, 2009 entitled "Minneapolis Is Working Overtime Trying to Kill an Octogenarian's Cat Named Hoppy for Defending His turf Against Canine Intruders.")

In Fairfield, Connecticut, five cat-hating women attempted in 2006 to have real estate broker Ruth Cisero's five-year-old polydactyl, Lewis, killed after he allegedly attacked them without provocation on seven separate occasions over a three-year period.

Upon investigation, however, it was determined that in all of those instances it actually was the accusers who had attacked Lewis. In some of the cases, the women foolishly intervened in standoffs between Lewis and their cats.

Lewis and Ruth Cisero

An Avon peddler, who later sued Cisero for $5,000, either stepped on Lewis's tail or closed a door on him. Bird advocates also doused him with water and threw eggs at him.

One neighbor even illegally trapped Lewis and took him to a shelter to be killed. Fortunately, the shelter was closed that day and Lewis was later freed.

Thousands of other cats are not nearly so lucky. (See Cat Defender posts of June 15, 2006 and March 9, 2007 entitled, respectively, "Serial Cat Killer on Long Island Traps Neighbors' Cats and Then Gives Them to Shelter to Exterminate" and "Long Island Serial Cat Killer Guilty of Only Disorderly Conduct, Corrupt Court Rules.")

In the end, however, the truth did not matter one whit because a state court placed Lewis under house arrest for the remainder of his life. Cisero also was placed on probation for two years and ordered to perform fifty hours of community service.

"They (the accusers) want to kill a cat for a scratch. These people have to get a life!" is how Fairfield resident Marisa Sampieri described the absurdity and injustice of the situation. (See Cat Defender posts of April 3, 2006 and June 26, 2006 entitled, respectively, "Free Lewis Now! Connecticut Tomcat, Victimized by a Bum Rap, Is Placed Under House Arrest" and "Lewis Cheats the Hangman but Is Placed Under House Arrest for the Remainder of His Life.")

Ana De Vito's thirteen-year-old resident feline, Bingo, was similarly shortchanged by the Swiss judicial system back in April when he was grounded for life after biting a neighbor who had intervened in a dispute between him and her cat. (See Cat Defender post of October 17, 2009 entitled "Bingo Is Placed Under House Arrest for Defending Himself Against a Neighbor Who Foolishly Intervened in a Cat Fight.")

In 2007, forty-eight-year-old Ann Hogben of Ramsgate, Kent, found herself in hot water after her twelve-year-old cat, Blackie, was accused of assaulting thirteen individuals over a six-year period. As it was later revealed, Blackie merely was protecting his turf against interlopers in that his victims consisted of five letter carriers from the Royal Mail, five paper boys, a construction worker, a fastfood delivery man, and a bobby. (See Cat Defender post of March 8, 2007 entitled "Blackie the Cat Has Postmen, Bobbies, and Deliverymen Looking Over Their Shoulders in Ramsgate, Kent.")

As was the case with Hoppy, Lewis, Bingo, and Blackie, the cause celebre in Pitsea is being driven by ailurophobia and nothing more. With there being up to fifteen unaltered and unfed feral cats living on the housing estate, that alone is bound to generate opposition.

In addition to Randall's blatant falsifications, the cats have been accused of destroying property, ruining gardens, keeping residents up at night with their vocalizations, and of rummaging through the trash.

"Every Friday the rubbish comes out and they just come out of the woodwork and rip open the bags, making an awful mess," Randall groused to the Daily Mail.

An unidentified fifty-nine-year-old female resident has accused the cats of damaging sheds and fences. "The situation has got out of hand," she complained to the The Sun on September 21st. (See "Feral Cat Pack Terrorize Town.") "It is like (Alfred Hitchcock's) The Birds around here but with cats."

Blackie and Ann Hogben

Another unidentified fifty-seven-year-old woman has kvetched about being deprived of a few winks because of the cats. While it is doubtful that there is much validity in any of those complaints, the rubbish situation could be easily remedied by properly securing skips and there are a multitude of organic, non-lethal methods of keeping cats out of gardens. As far as noise is concerned, it is doubtful that a few cats baying at the moon are in any way comparable to the dim churned up by Scrappy and other canines barking, vehicular traffic, stereos, and televisions.

In all likelihood, the cats were cruelly and irresponsibly abandoned by tenants of the housing estate and even if they were dumped there by outsiders they are still the estate's responsibility. Consequently, the estate should have long ago had them sterilized and provided with food, water, shelter and, if feasible, new homes.

If management of the estate had acted responsibly and humanely this situation never would have gotten out of hand in the first place. Even now the estate remains both obstinate and derelict in its duties and as a consequence the RSPCA, for better or worse, is going to be forced to intervene.

While it is at it, the organization should undertake an investigation into Randall's conduct. For siccing his dog on the cats and beating them with his cane, he obviously is guilty of the worst form of animal cruelty.

No one is required to like cats but the law should compel every member of society to respect their right to live. Likewise, whenever individuals, such as Randall, refuse to do so they must be held accountable for their crimes.

Unfortunately, there is not any legal redress for slandering and libeling cats. If there were, Randall, bird advocates, and wildlife biologists would soon find themselves in the dock with their wallets considerably lighter.

In conclusion, it is nothing short of revolting to see a young squirt like Randall living high on the hog at the expense of his countrymen. Instead of living on the dole and in public housing, he should be forced to earn his daily bread by the sweat of his brow.

He has a good fifty years remaining and as such should be put to work at some hard, back-breaking job, such as either mining coal or cleaning sewers. Perhaps such an arduous undertaking would sweat some of the lies and evil out of him and teach him to keep his hands and dog off of homeless cats.

Photos: Peter Lawson of the East News Press Agency (Randall and Scrappy, feral cat), Brian A. Pounds of the Connecticut Post (Lewis and Cisero), and Daily Mail (Blackie and Hogben).